Dream, Act, Plan, and Believe

If you are familiar with me, and my story, you probably know that I was in major survival mode for a few years. I was living my life fifteen minutes at a time, telling myself moment by moment “I can make it through the next fifteen minutes.” As I tried to regroup after trauma and recover from depression I was simply “in a state of being.”

This was a very strange indeed, because I have always been one to have big plans, big goals, big dreams. I’ve always been the “type A” personality that is driven to succeed. And suddenly I found myself without any plans. I couldn’t see myself in the future because my past was projected into the future, and that just seemed to painful.  It was a very scary place to be and one that can be dangerous for some people. I had lost hope.

I survived because I’m not a quitter. Nearly one year ago I was looking back at the “lost years” with regret. I regretted the wasted time. I regretted the “quality time” I missed with my children. My years were wasted, or so I thought.

But then God spoke to my heart. His voice was loud and clear. He asked me this question…

“Does the newborn baby regret growing?”

I reflected…

Does the newborn baby regret growing?
Does the newborn baby regret growing?

As I pondered I realized that a newborn baby simply “is” a wonderful creation. The newborn baby can’t regret growing. How can that even be possible?

That baby has been brought forth to a new life. True getting here was likely a struggle. After all being wrapped in a warm cocoon of love, and then suddenly being shoved down a birth canal and into a bright and cold room isn’t a walk in the park. But that process brought forth an opportunity for growth in a new environment.  It is a necessary part of our journey in life.

Once she arrives she spends the next six months simply “being.” The baby doesn’t have a choice. She may be ready to tackle the world. She may have big plans. But that little body simply can’t do it all yet. That baby brought forth to new life “is” a “human being” and not a “human doing.”

It provided an opportunity for growth in a new environment.

So thank you God for pointing out to me that my soul was being born anew. That I was going through a birthing process and that once here I needed to “simply be” for some time. I was giving birth to a new life, giving birth to a new souls reflection.

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